Given the boundless diversity of human individuals, the concept of love is understood and scripted in many different ways. This essay will argue the love employed by her (the narrater, sorry I’m using a third-person view for this essay), only functions as a powerful motive conquering the human weaknesses to become a better person, but of no intention to ask for a mutually reciprocal affection in return. Specifically, it will analyze love in terms of its rare property as the chances to recognize the beloved are minimized by social influences. Further, it will access love as an innate aspiration to the beautiful and a constructive ideology to against human weaknesses, thus achieving both the loved one and beloved one.
Maybe the perfect man can be found everywhere, but love is rare. She used to have a hallucination that love was an easy find because she witnessed how her girlfriends fell for their boyfriends beautifully and bravely. She thought it would not be hard to love a good person. However, her first date ended up her dating partner discerning she did not like him enough. She was quite embarrassed because she made lots of efforts, or at least superficial efforts to persuade both her and him that she liked him. His personal quality traits made him a perfect dating partner—curious, smart, care for her, high agreeableness and openness. He was even everything right from evolutionary perspective, as strong as loving climbing, as rich as earning more than 20 times than her future self. But it turned out that she could only love him as a friend. She was just following the rules under social influences that mistakenly implemented in her mind, which was, to find a perfect man and the affection would be developed later on. However, the truth was, the heart never asked for “the best”, let alone there was no way to correctly define and measure the dimension of “the best”. Human species is not the only existence who finds love can not be developed from the perfect, so does the wine. Cult wine, whose direct indicator of quality was the price rather than wine estate, was produced using the most expensive wood buckets, the best winemakers and the best grapes even though they were delivered from different vineyards. Its price easily beat Lafitte but the uniqueness of wine was lost due to assimilation of the standard of “the best” during production process. The unique tension between lovers, the particular quality of grape that exclusively produced from certain area of vineyards, are the characteristics define the best and love. Love is rare and precious.
The essence of love is preserved in the form of hardships.
Love asks her to overcome the sins for the loved one and enables her to become a better person. It makes her brave.
Love is not only about passions and desires, the core value of love is revealed with the company of struggle and exhaustion. In other words, the essence of love is preserved in the form of hardships. Allowing someone to shape your personality, to exert influences on your recognition and understanding of the world and even to become a part of your identity is a serious matter which takes either time or guts, sometimes both. He seems to live in a self-dependence, isolated yet beautiful restricted zone in a chronological state. She admits that sometimes she cant help wondering about that world out of curiosity, but she is aware that world is too high-end to approach. She is not confident in her current intelligence and ability to get close— but she likes him, she does, and it makes her think he deserves the best of everything. So that even though she knows that her ability is not quite there yet, she doesn’t mind to overcome the weaknesses and fix her problems to become a better person, to learn Shakespeare and Dante, to get straight A in all classes and to get into Oxford. Love asks her to overcome the sin for the loved one and enables her to become a better person. It makes her brave. People say loving the right person would shine out of you. She wants to thank him deeply, for being in her life which allows her to strive to shine.
Claiming possession of someone in the name of love is nothing but a reflection of human weakness, selfishness. Rather, true sensical love is to free the beloved, to support him becoming the person he chooses to be and pursuing the happiness he recognizes even if it doesn’t include her. She’d give him her best wishes, helps and blessings to rise him. She knows that she would be sad, or very sad knowing he doesn’t like her in return though because she’s not programmed like the software. She has emotions and weaknesses. But at least no matter how sad she would be, it won’t change the fact that coming to him was one of the most beautiful and brave moment in her life. She could wish a thousand times that person would be her, but if not, not even if she could understand Dante and got into Oxford, seeing him to seize the chance of his happiness would still be a gratification that comforted her. She has some expectations, but not enough to hurt herself. She must balance, otherwise even a little bit of selfishness and the desire to claim possession would pollute her love for him directly, and him indirectly. He was one of the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen, defiling him would be the last thing she wanted to do.
Although admiring him does not necessarily require his permission, she cant help thinking of telling him how attractive he is. At same time, she’d like to make the point clear, she is not asking, and will never be asking him to like her back. The right to like him already made her on top of the world. Every step further is an extra bonus. She doesn’t ask for more. She wont cry either. She is trying to write it in a way that does not look like a love letter because he does not want her to discuss emotions. But it is still imperative to say, thank you, for 那么美好的你出现在这个世界上，她想替这个世界，谢谢你的出现。